The Forced Extrovert

I really, truly and honestly dislike people. Not any specific people, all of the people actually. Human behavior is so wild and I would much rather watch it from the sidelines, out of the line of fire. I don’t like doing things that force me to be around people. Like, leaving my house at all can be too peopley.

Now I know what you’re going to say – But you work full time as a nurse. Yup I sure do. But hear me out though; I want to help people. I am often the good Samaritan. I am usually the one “investigating” situations that sound like someone needs assistance. I can be found helping confused seniors or upset children. I go above and beyond for the patients I see daily and their families. I spend all day spraying ALL the sunshine and rainbows at people. ALL Day. Every Single Day. So much sunshine. It is mentally and emotionally draining. I am exhausted at the end of each day and I do NOT, under any circumstances, want to “people” outside of Mon thru Fri 7am to 4pm, excluding Holidays. After 4pm, my empathy reserves and my compassion bank are just as empty as the gas tank in my SUV. Don’t get me wrong, I will always help someone in a situation. That is just in my nature. But these days you might hear me grumble about it.

Forcing me to interact with the general population is just really unkind. I don’t wanna! Leave me to myself reading some fantasy novel or indulging in a movie with one of the many living things in my household. Don’t ask me to go to a place. I mean, I probably will attend especially if it is of importance to someone. I will just be standing in the corner or off to the side if there is not an available corner, being so uncomfortable and awkward and in my own head. Im often mistaken for stuck up but im really just suffering in my own social anxiety and trying to survive. Be a good friend and invite yourself over to my house in pajamas to drink wine hidden away from the general public. That’s all.

There are many perks to coming to be a shut in with me. There’s no dress code at my house. It is not high class, more of a trashy sheik. Throw your hair on top of your head and show up mismatched in sweats/tank top with fuzzy slipper socks and sandals. It’s acceptable. Actually, it’s more than acceptable, it is in fact encouraged. I like to cook but LOVE to bake. We can literally eat, drink and be merry. Without the awkward bunch of strangers lurking.

Long gone are my days of going to a bar or club or even a party. Small gatherings are tolerable. Sometimes. If I have a person there who grounds me. Otherwise the outside world is just one giant dementor from Harry Potter, slowing sucking my soul with each interaction. It's not that I don't want to be social, it's just all too much stimulation anymore. Be a good friend to the introverts that you love and just don’t make them People too often. We appreciate it.